One Thousand and One Scenes

Do you want to know how to construct a scene? New to BDSM? Are you a Top/Switch that wants to know how to create a scene? Are you a bottom that wants to know what to expect from it?


“Scene” is a term in the Kinky world that defines an interaction involving BDSM dynamics. A scene can be planned with days in advance and lined out with specifics or negotiated on the spot. Or anything in between. But never on the go as you play. 

The more put together you have your scene, the  more safety and fun Top(s)/bottom(s) will have. Building and running a scene can be as easy or as difficult as the parties involved want it to be. You can try as much as you want and you can have it last for as long as you desiree. However, there is a certain procedure for better results. When building a scene, there are three steps to consider: The Planning, The Execution and The Feedback.


The Planning: This is the moment where the parties get together and talk about what they want to do. This includes descriptions of wardrobe, expectations, toys, limits, medical conditions, types of play, triggers, boundaries… It is a big conversation otherwise called negotiation. It is very important to be as detailed as possible about expectations, toys, limits and boundaries when playing with someone for the first couple of times. Once the Top(s) gather this information, they proceed to create the scene beforehand playing with the bottom(s). Things to consider for the Top(s) are: Knowing the reason behind the scene, Gather the tools needed and Plan the activities.

Knowing the reasons behind the scene - Maybe you just want to explore if you connect with each other. Maybe you are trying to test your limits. Or maybe you are helping them sub(s) to overcome a fear or an insecurity. But every single scene has a reason why it is being created. How deep the reason is directly proportionated to the complexity of the scene. It is up to you as a Top(s) to determine what the goal to achieve is.

Gather the tools needed - The right tools for the right job. It can be specific wardrobe needed for the scene. It can be a particular toy you need to get. Or it can be a run to a home improvement store for some rigging components. Either way, you have to make sure you do a run down of all items that you will need for that day and have them in advance. You must also make sure you test them and get a hold of them way beforehand.

Plan the activities - You can be as detailed as a movie script. Or maybe just a mental outline of your scene. But you must have an idea of what you are doing and where you are heading. The most common error with new people is running out of ideas or not knowing what to do after using one toy. This step will prevent you from that and will provide you with a guideline of how your scene can potentially be played. Note: Nothing ever goes as planned. That is why you are always open to change and with a reachable first aid kit.


The  Execution: This is the moment you have been waiting for. Time to play! Like any good storyline, the scene is divided in Three Acts: Set-up, Confrontation and Resolution.

Set Up: This is where you set the mood of the scene. If it is an interrogation scene, you can take out all those intimidating toys. For a sensual scene, you can play some music and start turning the candles. Or if it is a training scene, this is where the collar is being placed in order to start receiving orders. Little by little, you start progressing into the scene by warming up physically and mentally your bottom(s).
Confrontation: After a good warm up. You start building the energy up until you reach the Amber Zone or Subspace. The Amber Zone is that moment where the bottom(s) wonder if they can take or do more. It is an edgy zone where you can play between  or sub-space is that moment where you can play between intense and gentle sensations to create a rollercoaster all the way till the end of their tolerance. On the other side, the Subspace is an altered physical and psychological state of being that is expressed trough a plethora of feelings and actions brought up by adrenaline, endorphin and oxytocins. 
Resolution: After reaching either the Amber Zone or Subspace, we start with the cool down of the scene. This is the exact opposite of the setup. Here you build the energy down. After taking care of your bottom(s) you clean and put away toys as well as equipment. Right after comes the Aftercare. The Aftercare is manifested in different ways according to different people. Some people like to cuddle, some like to chat, some like to eat chocolate. This is something that has been talked during the negotiation. It is uncommon, but occasional, that some triggers or injuries may occur. As a Top(s) you must be prepared to take care of that and be mindful of what is needed to deal with an issue if it arises. (First Aid Kit, Blanket, Emergency Numbers, etc...)


The Feedback: This is the final step of the scene which provides information from all parties involved. It starts with a follow-up one or two days after the scene. This follow-up is also a good moment to provide feedback on all sides. At this moment, the Top(s) will have made their observations and results from the previous experience. And the feedback encloses the full experience for the growth of all parties involved. Wether you play again with that person or not, this feedback is an empowering moment for you as a Top(s), bottom(s) or Switch(s).



Meister of M has been a part of the LA BDSM Community for over 6+ years. He currently holds the Publicity Chair position at Club Threshold and volunteers as a Dungeon Monitor for some of its parties. Club Threshold is the oldest pansexual BDSM club in Southern California celebrating 36 years. He is a Sensual Dominant with a sadist touch, an entrepreneur and a co-host of the party “Deseos Oscuros” which takes place the 3rd Friday of every month at Threshold. He also teaches flogging, negotiation and sensual play amongst other classes and panels.  He is a Sensual Dominant. His primary focus is on delighting all of the senses. While he enjoys the surprise and anticipation in a scene, he focuses on trust and safety. Negotiation is key and communication imperative to develop a deep knowledge of his sub, slave, partner or bottom. Information will heighten the level of arousal. His greatest kink is pleasure. 

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